Why Being Idle Is Very Hard Work

Posted: April 22, 2010 by aknownemass in Humour
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From the works of A-known-e-mass

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Greetings good people. Its been a while since we last communicated and in case you missed me, then so did I you. Let me first begin by welcoming back my brain, it has been away on a long fruitful working holiday. The good thing is that my brain decided to go on holiday at or about the same time as the assignments in my office. I have therefore in the recent past had the opportunity to both be work free and in most cases brain free.

This recent period has however been a great learning experience. I have learnt a few things (imagine just how many more things I could have learnt if my brain had stayed with me the whole period rather than only paying a few ‘official visits’). It has also been a good period to interact and build bonds. I shall share a few things that I’ve learnt here but would also encourage those of you who may have been undergoing similar experiences to share them too. Sharing in this case need not be with someone else as among the things that I’ve learnt is that there are those who are perfectly capable of sharing only with themselves.

The first thing that I learnt is that when you are cruising or floating through life ‘brain free’, then you are in very good company. Good here means that you will encounter very many other adherents of this ‘brain free’ lifestyle. I was actually surprised to learn that there is a very big community of ‘brain freers’. Due to the rather frequent incidences of their brains being AWOL (away with official leave), this community has developed the unique ability to think with other parts of their bodies. There are those who have shifted their thinking processes to the stomach, others to their fists, a big number has preferred their mouths while yet a bigger group has opted to use that part of the body that is described as being above the knees but below the waist.

I also learnt that there is a group that have miraculously been able to redirect their thought processes to their wallets and purses. There are unconfirmed rumours that this ability is more likely to vest on people whose ancestry can be traced to the vicinity of some mountain. There were also rumours that there are those who are successfully thinking using their hearts while a very, and I mean very, small group is said to be using their souls. Those familiar with the ‘brain free’ community will know that rumours are in very high supply. Demand has however consistently outstripped this supply and more rumours are thus highly encouraged and sought.

The second thing that I learnt was that being idle is very hard work. You can imagine waking up and going to your usual place of work only to realise that the only relevant work you have for the day is logging in to your computer and shutting it. Now imagine that for more than seven hours, you have to not only appear to be busy but you also have to appear like you are busy doing something useful. Now further imagine that you have to do this while your brain is AWOL and while the office is full of both busy people and a people who are members of the ‘brain free’ community (if you can imagine all this then please note that you are idle).

Anyway, I have developed what I now recognise as critical skills for any employee or at least for any employee who though idle, need to appear to be working. These are skills that will see you promoted faster than you could have ever imagined. However, since my brain has since made a comeback and since I happen to be from the vicinity of a certain mountain, I shall not share these skills free of charge. Any interested persons are advised to ona mimi kando.

  1. Shirley says:

    Simply put…An idle mind is the devil’s workshop.

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